Review: Committed: a Skeptic Makes Peace With Marriage, by Elizabeth Gilbert

After reading Eat, Pray, Love, I had very high hopes for Elizabeth Gilbert's next novel. While EPL had slow moments, on the most part I felt that it was an amazing book. When I heard that Committed was about to be released, I reserved my copy at the library waaaay in advance.

I hate to say this, but I might as well admit it: I can't get through it.

That's not exactly true; of course, I could get through it, if I wanted to. It's not written in Klingon. I just have lost steam to the point where I'm finding myself avoiding reading it, which means that all the great stuff have in line behind it to devour is collecting dust while I resist admitting defeat. Now, after resorting to skipping pages today, I am ready to throw in the proverbial towel. I will not be reading this one cover-to-cover, word-for-word.

Both the title and the book jacket lead the reader to believe that this will be a novel about Gilbert's inner struggles regarding marriage, which is being literally thrust upon her and her non-American sig other when he is turned away by customs after 9/11 for overusing his visa. It is a marriage, a breakup, or deportation. While the two wait for the visa papers to be straightened out so they can marry in the US (oddly, if they marry in another country, the American govt will be even more suspicious that theirs is a marriage of convenience and deny entry), they travel the globe, and Gilbert decides to investigate the customs of marriage, turning it inside-out, looking at it from all angles, in an attempt to find a more comfortable perspective than that she has internalized from American culture. The title and summary are very misleading, for this is not the story of discovery within their interpersonal relationship, but rather Gilbert's reaction to the relationship solely, which for her leads to investigative reporting.

It's not that the book is hugely boring, per se, but rather that Gilbert takes every. single. point and beats it to a pulp; what starts out as an interesting point after five pages of deliberation and examination becomes very tiresome. She interviews individuals from several Asian countries she visits, she reads great volumes of written work on the topic, including statistical studies done by large universities, she argues for and against various religious-based perspectives, and regurgitates all of the information she collects in what begins to feel like a giant college term paper. There is little of the inner Gilbert that we were privy to in EPL, which is what made that particular work, also non-fiction and full of research, speak to so many women around the world. Even though this work was supposed to be about her working through her feelings about marriage vis-a-vis her relationship with Felipe, there is precious little in this book about their actual relationship. While she includes a scant few conversations here and there as a jump-off point for discussing more research, Committed is a far less endearing novel, quite an irony for a book about love.

One thing that might have helped would have been to have Felipe's voice more present; as it is, he has no part at all other than in the third person. Since the relationship crisis involves them both, having him participate more, perhaps by writing small asides or even footnotes might have been a bonus. Had she been more concise, or used (several pages' worth) fewer examples, her points, which generally had interesting and/or thought-provoking kernels, would be more readable. Finally, Gilbert seems to go around in circles, examining the same points several times over, and it becomes exhausting.

I started skipping pages when I was about halfway through, and by the final third of the book, I was skimming, looking for something that had anything to do with why I was reading the book - namely, a connection with Gilbert. It really wasn't to be found. I found even their eventual wedding, which isn't discussed in great detail, left me apathetic. If you are looking for a dissertation on marriage customs and theories from around the world, this is the book for you. If you're looking for the human connection that made EPL so readable and informative on a more emotional level, you'll be sorely disappointed.

Rating: two stars. well-informed research paper on marriage, lacking in personal connection