Review: The Gates, A Novel, by John Connolly

If any of you have ever read Stephen King's only foray into children's literature, The Eyes of the Dragon (and if you haven't, Do So Right Away, it's wonderful), and Norton Juster's The Phantom Tollbooth (again, go to the store NOW and get it if you haven't), imagine taking them both and putting them into a literary blender. Sprinkle them with a smidge of 'Men in Black'. The lumpy goodness that you would pour out would be John Connolly's The Gates (of Hell Are About to Open).

This wry and witty novel centers around Samuel Johnson, a brainy eleven year-old British boy who accidentally witnesses the opening of a portal to Hell while peeking through a neighbor's window. The unfortunate neighbors, who were merely bored suburbanites looking for a little thrill, are having a seance in their basement when an interesting malfunction occurs many miles away during a routine operation of the Hadron collider (a machine that attempts to create tiny black holes for scientific study); the two simultaneous events lead to their being possessed by four demons, much like the farmer in Men in Black is worn like a cheap suit by the cockroach alien. The leader, whose job it is to prepare the way for Satan to escape from Hell, senses little Samuel Johnson (and his little dog too!) and sets about trying to capture him.

Her pursuit of Samuel leads to what is undoubtedly the funniest aspect of the book; the intrduction of several entirely inept demons, such as The Thing Under The Bed, who is new to the job and can't begin to imagine how to frighten anyone, and Nurd, The Scourge of Five Deities, who initially is transported accidentally to earth, only to have his illusions of grandeur (and his body) abruptly squashed by a vacuum. His later appearances grow increasingly hilarious as he becomes entangled in the plot to send the evil demons back to hell, saving the earth. It is in the final scenes of the novel, however, that Connolly pulls out all the stops, with zombie-fighting vicars, accidentally-drunken demons, and the shovel-bearing man who singlehandedly beats several demons into the ground for messing with his rosebushes.

It is impossible to convey the wittiness and snarky glee with which these events occur. The oddity in itself would be interesting, but Connolly's genius lies both in his crafty turns of phrase and in his ability to weave the deadpan British humor into the fantastical goings-on that Samuel is dealing with. By having a child as the main character, the author disposes with the potential problems of disbelief and fear of insanity that an adult character would have in the same situation, thus making him able to pull the reader right into the meat of the story.

In addition, the book is enjoyable on many levels, and its lack of gore or foul language (again, a benefit of having a child as a main character) combined with widely-appealing material makes it appropriate for anyone above the age of ten. As soon as I finished it, I immediately read it with my daughter, who is almost eleven, and while she didn't get all of the more adult references Connolly sneaks in, the silliness of a confused and embarrassed Underbed Monster and a demon named Nurd who ends up in increasingly ridiculous situations (teleported into a sewer! smooshed like the road runner in front of a truck! arrested by clueless police for massive speeding in his new love, the Porsche!) were more than enough to bring her along for the ride. Some of the more adult references I explained to her, such as puns on popular culture, and others I let sail over her head, laughing to myself.

I cannot reccomend this book strongly enough. It's funny without being condescending, innocent and yet wickedly witty. The brave Samuel and his friends, including Nurd, are endearing and entirely realistic (yes, even the insecure Nurd) in their upside-down world. There are the occasional slower chapters, particularaly those describing the Hadron collider in detail, but even those have snarky footnotes to liven them up. The ending leaves an obvious opening for a sequel, and I have all ten fingers crossed that there will indeed be another chapter in the book of Samuel.

Rating: five out of five stars. Smart, witty, kooky and fun romp through the ridiculous.